Ginger supremacy is on the rise and I don’t hate it.
Descended from Vikings, Aslan, and pure rays of golden sunshine, Daywalkers are sacred creatures that frolick among us with their freckled cheeks and raging tempers as a sign from God that life is worth living.
Contrary to popular belief, they will not suck out your soul and replace it with rainbow sprinkles. In fact, they are quite useful in the following capacities:
- Punching Bag
- Freshman Year Mistake
I’m all about calling a spade a spade. Red-heads and strawberry blondes will try and tell you that they’re not actually part of the Ginger Cult, but they are. I reccomend putting our pasty friends in their place by calling them by the following names:
- Rojo Caliente
- Fuego Face
- Red Robin
WARNING: Gingers are often pyscho. Not necessarily Norman Bates whacko or Maenad status, but definitly lean towards the side of stage 5. Booze really fuels their fire, no pun intended. Don’t feed them Gin or Red Skittles. Rage issues are common, but you can weather the storm by tickling their tum tums or giving them wet willies.
As someone who has always actively sought out ginger sidekicks – with sassy rouge power names to boot! Rebecca, Hadley, Polly. I highly reccomend procuring a token ginge – they make for the best stories in the am and are rarely sober, a truly honorable distinction.