As humiliating as it is to admit, I have given into the black hole of tweenybopper lit that is the Hunger Games trilogy.
Some background: A couple of weeks ago I was about to board an Amtrak train and realized that I had nothing but a half-charged iPhone to keep me company. So I swung by Barnes & Noble looking for the top book on my summer reading list – Winning by Jack Welch – only to find it completely sold out. File under: “Only in DC”
But once I got past the Harry-Potter-on-Lithium writing quality, it became clear that Susan Collins knows what’s up. This shiz has it all: carnage… family tragedy… fuego… characters with names like Glimmer and Foxface…. and of course, a particularly RI-EFFING-DICULOUS love triangle.
You’re a waste of the female anatomy.
That asexual dingbat needs a libido and a slap in the face STAT. “Waahhh poor me I want to die a virg but these two hot hotty hotties are all up on my nuts.” Go eat a groosling you unworthy dumb dumb.
P.S. Jennifer Lawrence = not hot. Makes sense her character was named after a root vegetable. She looks like a parsnip and has the personality of a radish.
Instead of setting aside my tall glass of haterade and settling down, I’m going to take this rant to the next level: see below for my rundown of the most frustrating love triangles ever concocted.