It’s no secret that my hero in blogging (and in life) is Michael K over at Dlisted. I honestly don’t know how I would make sense of this sick sad world we live in without his searing commentary at least thrice daily.
Not convinced? Take a look at his read on the KStew-is-a-harlot situation and tell me this man isn’t the Kierkegard of our time.
Among my favorite features on Dlisted is his “Hot Slut of the Day” award. Recent recipients are almost exclusively comprised of people with funny names (Dong Dong, Destinee Hooker, etc), forgotten icons from a misspent 80s childhood, Olympians with freakish body parts and/or sparkly Michael Jackson bathing suits, and notable members of the animal kingdom (the Chinese Penis Fish, a baby sloth that thinks a stuffed animal is its mother). Most importantly, though, Michael K loves himself a tranny mess with a bad attitude and a questionable beauty routine. Who doesn’t?
Which brings me to a new feature here on the Festivus inspired by Dlisted’s Hot Slut of the Day…. the Miss Festivus Awards. Without further ado, let’s crown our first lucky winner.
Congratulations, Aliyah Mustfina!
Now that the excitement of Olympic gymnastics has come and gone, I’m left with a void in my life that only a fearsome Ruski Mean Girl with glitter in her hair can fill. Aliyah, you may have won the Bronze in the all-around, but you win TWO gold medals in my book: one for your impeccably over the top eye makeup/hair situation, and another for your out-of-this-world bitchface and inability to look happy.
<a href=”http://gifsoup.com/view/1268161/bitchface.html” target=”_blank”><img src=”http://gifsoup.com/imager.php?id=1268161&t=o” border=”0″/></a><br /><a href=”http://gifsoup.com/” title=”GIFSoup” target=”_blank”>GIFSoup</a>
Unfortunately if you missed Aliya bitch-slapping her coach after she botched her balance beam routine in London you’re shiz out of luck, because Youtube somehow has zero documentation of what was a truly unforgettable Olympic moment.